Manuary

Hey, I wasn't looking to get into this. It just sort of fell in my lap. I came back from Christmas Break and I hadn't shaved in a couple of days. There was a little stubble peppering my jaw, but nothing too spicy. Then in came my boss.

"Tim," he said, his face lighting up in utter joy, "I didn't think you had it in you."

"In me what?" I said.

"In you to do Manuary."

Manuary, you see, is an event held for back office employees during the month of January. The way to win said event is a little unclear. I'm not sure if it relies on length, thickness or the overall gnarl factor. But, because he was so excited, I had to commit.

So now, as it is the 28th, I have gone almost a whole month without shaving. It's gross. My mustache is a magnet for food, my beard constantly itches and when I'm wearing my wool cap, I resemble a homeless man.

If I don't win this, I'll be very disappointed.