Tight Jeans, Tighter Bros

So I decided to get me some skinny-legged jeans. You know, some trendy stove-pipes that pull my socks off whenever I pull them off. Just tight enough to show the backside goods to the ladies, if you see where I am going with this.

Dan was kind enough to accompany me. He is a jeans expert. He knows the Levis like a different language. 501's, 511's, 514's, 527's were all options he gave me. 

Hell, I thought, how come buying jeans is so damn tough.

We first went to Urban Outfitters and I tried on a pair of the 511's. These were tight, let me tell you. I could see the flex of my calf through the fabric, which is pretty impressive because I don't have much muscle there to flex in the first place. These jeans were so tight i couldn't get them over my boxers. To get them off I had to sit on the floor of the dressing room and pull on each leg one by one.

I imagined how embarrassing it would be if someone opened the door just then.

I passed on the 511's. Didn't want to deal with that every day.

Next we got to the Levi's store and I tried on a pair of 514's. Now these are sweet. And because of our terrible-economy-pricing, they were only 24 bucks. Regular 60.

Damn I look good.

Although with the new tightness, I have noticed a slowdown in blood circulation...